Handling adoption trauma and loss

| Jul 21, 2021 | Adoptions |

People who bring nonbiological children into their families are sometimes bringing older children. Even though every adoption in Missouri is unique, there are some similarities, especially when the children are, indeed, older. No matter what is behind an adoption, it always starts with loss for the child and feelings associated with that loss could be traumatic. Experts say even some adults who were babies when they were adopted struggle with issues as adults.

What an adoptee may be feeling

Not all children process things in the same way and not all biological parents choose adoption for the same reasons. Children who are adopted may show signs they are struggling with some issues and may benefit from seeing a therapist. Here are some things adoptive parents should watch out for:

  • Struggling with self-esteem, self-confidence or identity
  • Feeling like they don’t fit in
  • Difficulty forming emotional bonds
  • Learning disabilities
  • Depression
  • Anxiety
  • Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHA)
  • Addiction issues and/or substance abuse

Encourage open communication

An adoptive family needs to encourage the adopted child to be open and honest about what he or she is feeling and make it quite clear it is safe to do so and there won’t be any judgment. Children want to see patience and understanding from their adoptive parents and families. These children may have been through a lot and will likely need extra support as they move into adulthood.

People in Missouri who are considering adoption will be able to overcome the bumps knowing as much as they can about the process and about their adoptive child. There are professionals who can help such as therapists, lawyers, clergy, etc. When adoptees and adopters come together with love, they can continue the journey in the best, most positive way possible.