With Thanksgiving less than a week away, the holiday season is already underway. Things will obviously look very different this year due to Covid-19 and the restrictions that come with it. But in a typical year, the next six weeks would be prime time for making memories with those you love – especially your kids.
Unfortunately, the holiday season can feel very bittersweet after a divorce for several reasons. First, you may be mourning the breakup of the “complete family,” including your spouse and your children all under one roof. Second, it is difficult because holidays are likely to be a coveted and contentious issue when it comes to making the custody schedule with your ex-spouse.
Alternating holidays for parents who share custody
If you are currently going through a divorce or expect that you will be soon, you should know that if you plan to share custody, holidays are likely to be a sticking point in negotiations. Much of the time, co-parents end up creating a custody/visitation schedule in which holidays with the kids are alternated from year to year, with consecutive holidays on a reverse schedule. For instance, mom might have Thanksgiving with kids this year and Christmas with kids next year, while dad has the kids on Christmas this year and Thanksgiving next year.
Is this an ideal solution? Almost certainly not. But nothing about divorce and co-parenting is ideal. We can only hope to make the best out of a difficult situation.
It’s also good to remember that there are many solutions to the holidays depending on your relationship with and proximity to your co-parent. Check back soon as we continue this discussion in our next post.